Word of the Year: SAVOR

Happy Hump Day, readers!

Nine days in and I'm feeling really good about this upcoming year and am excited to see what's in store.

Blogging can be so cathartic and sharing my reflections of the past year and intentions for the new year here is a really good exercise. One of my all time favorite quotes is "I cannot advise that we remain as we are." by Socrates. This idea of constant improvement really drives me, and reflection and intention are an important part of growth.

So before I dive into my word of 2019, savor, I want to take a moment to reflect on 2018, which was truly one of the best years of my life.

(This is a long post, so if you'd rather skip ahead, scroll down to the graphic and start there.)

My word last year was intentional, with a particular focus in the areas of family and career. I shared that I felt as if I was on a precipice, the end of a high dive, and I wanted to make sure my jumps into the next phase of my life were the right ones.

In terms of career, I knew I had landed in the right profession, but I hadn't yet found just the right fit. I spent a good bit of time job searching last year and was relentless in my search. I knew I needed to land somewhere that had lasting power, and even turned down a few really great job offers, so that I could ultimately say yes to my dream job. I've been in my role now for nearly 9 months and really feel I have "landed." I have room to grow, stretch, and challenge myself; a boss who encourages creativity and risk; and a reasonable workload.  Additionally, I have incredible flexibility, which was a huge deciding factor during my job search, and will be crucial once we have bambinos.

Which leads me to my next point: family. This time last year, we knew we weren't quite ready to start a family, and wanted to focus on being intentional in a few areas to prepare for babes in the not so distant future: finances, spontaneity, and health. Finding a job where I could see myself as a working mom was one box I knew I needed to check before thinking about adding a baby to the mix; and my new role also fortunately was a nice title and salary jump. As newlyweds last year, we also felt the need to "catch up" post-wedding and honeymoon, and also figure out what financial path to take as a married couple. This wasn't a huge curve ball, as we had been living together for a few years, but it's something we're still working at and tweaking to find the right balance. Next, we  knew we wanted to take some more time to be selfish and spontaneous. We planned a somewhat last minute trip to England last year when opportunity struck (our friends, Erin and Ryan, are living in London temporarily). We drove to the Eastern Shore on a whim to see a 4:00 am rocket launch! We said "No thanks!" (countless) times to our meal plan and opted for Mexican and margaritas instead. Finally, in terms of health, we wanted to build habits to make us as healthy as possible before parenthood. I'm excited to say I'm starting 2019 about 14 pounds lighter than I started 2018, but more importantly I'm more physically fit and have a good balance in my diet. Sleep is still a health area we need to improve on, but hey, maybe, we're just preparing ourselves for the sleep deprivation that will come with children.

Okay, now onto 2019. That "moment" to reflect on 2018 got a bit wordy. Hopefully you're still with me, because I am PUMPED to jump into my word for this year!

savor (v): to delight in; enjoy

It took me quite a while to find this word. It was on the tip of my tongue for a while.

I've shared on here before that I'm Type A, a planner, a doer. I don't necessarily think those are bad traits, but I do find myself sometimes focusing so much on what's next, that I'm not fully present and enjoying what's now. I've even noticed a trend where in the second half of a month, I'll often say "I can't wait for X MONTH to be over." Not because it's a hard month, or there's something I'm looking forward to the next month, simply because I feel like I want to just keep going. I also sometimes struggle (though I've gotten much better) to let go of things that are outside of my control, or to accept when things don't go according to my plan and timeline. When I was in therapy in college, my therapist once said to me something like "Allie, I know you can explain all your feelings, analyze them, tell me why you should or shouldn't feel a certain way; but I want you to focus instead on just being in the feeling." 

For all these reasons, I knew I wanted this year to be about, quite frankly, just being. I considered the words breathe and serenity, but they felt too zen. I considered faith or trust, but both of those have connotations that strayed from my meaning. I also thought about gratitude or contentment, but they weren't quite right either.

As I continued and continued to go back to the drawing board what kept coming to mind was our recent New Year's Eve. We stayed in and early in the night, I was sitting by the fire sipping bubbly, Millie was next to me, Bryce was nearby in the kitchen, and Van Morrison was playing on the radio. In that moment all I could feel was pure joy. Similarly, when I think back to our trip to England, one of, if not the most, favorite moments was at Stonehenge when we sat in the grass, paused, and took in the rolling green hills, blue skies, grazing sheep, and wonder of the monument. The moments where I'm most happy, content, joyful are the moments were I am truly stopping, breathing, and savoring the here and now. 

So as I think to and celebrate all I achieved in 2018, in 2019 I want to focus less on what's next and more on seizing the moment.  Achievements will come, of this I'm sure, but what's most important is savoring the experiences - big and small, happy and sad, easy and tough - along the way.

Happy New Year, friends!

Do you set goals, resolutions, a word for the year?

Have a great day!

30!

Happy November 28, 2018...aka my 30th birthday!

jumpsuit

It's crazy to think when I started this blog in 2011, I was just 22, still in college, and a few months shy of meeting Bryce. It's been with me for most of my 20s and huge milestones like graduation, teaching, leaving teaching, a new career, Millie, an engagement and wedding (Sheesh! I'm so behind on getting y'all these posts!), and more; so it only feels fitting to document this milestone. I'll start this post recapping my 30th birthday cocktail party that was a couple weekends ago on the 17th and then end with 30 thoughts. Thoughts on turning 30, life lessons, random tidbits, and more.

Now buckle your seatbelts, you're in for a long ride with this post!

Before jumping into the cocktail party, I have to recap you on the night before. Bryce's hunt club is not far from NASA's Wallops Flight Facility, and from the dock in their marsh there is a clear view of the rocket launch pad. Bryce has always dreamed of seeing a rocket launch, but they are often in the  middle of the night during the week, and also frequently get cancelled due to weather. The morning of the 16th, the day before my party, Bryce told me a rocket was being launched that night/morning at 4:01 am- weather forecasts were clear and there was a 95% chance of launch. He asked if I'd be game to go. I think he was shocked when I said yes! I told him I had plans to get a mani pedi after work, so if he would get Millie packed and loaded, we could head out as soon as I got home and had a few minutes to throw some yoga pants in a bag. I also requested that we stop and get brunch at my favorite Virginia Beach brunch spot Leaping Lizard Cafe on the way home, and that we get back with enough time for me to run before my blow out at 4:30. (Spoiler Alert: I skipped the run, but ran 8 miles the next day!) Y'all, what an experience it was! How amazing to see the sky light up and a rocket launch all the way up into space. Not to mention the rush we got from the spontaneity of it all. We've talked about embracing this time pre-kids to be spontaneous and it really inspired me to be more adventurous day to day! Here are a few photos recapping, and you can see more from the adventure on my Insta highlight reel here.

We arrived at about 9:30, popped a bottle of Moet, and then headed to bed at 11:00.

The alarm was set for 3:30 am, we got up, bundled up, and headed down to the marsh!

We followed along on Facebook Live in advance of the launch hearing cool tidbits (like the fact that the rocket had materials to study crystals that could teach us more about Parkinson's) and the final countdown.  

We went back to sleep from about 4:30 to 8:00 am, and then took in some final marsh air before heading home with a pitstop for brunch along the way. I really truly don't think there's any place more beautiful than Virginia.

So now onto the partay! My mother-in-law, RoseMarie, was so sweet to host a cocktail party. While I didn't get as many detail photos as I would have liked, I did get some great photos throughout the night!

RoseMarie believes homemade birthday cakes are the most special

and made each one of these cakes herself: the top with hot pink candles is a lemon cake, 

middle with yellow candles is key lime pound, and bottom with light pink candles is chocolate.

Yes, I did have a piece of each. The chocolate (recipe here) was my favorite!

Heavy hors d'oeuvres (also all homemade by RoseMarie) were served buffet style and passed. On the buffet, guests enjoyed beef tenderloin with grainy mustard, horse radish, and rolls; ham salad biscuits; artichoke dip, and chicken salad tarts. Mini crabcakes, ramekin-sized pastas in the pinks, and cranberry brie bites were passed. Cheese straws were also available at the bar for munching.

How gorgeous are these peach roses?

Personal-sized pastas in the pink!

I always enjoy the opportunity to bring separate groups of friends together, and the party included childhood friends, work friends, college friends, and more. Here are some snapshots with some of my guests.

With my mama!

Look at that stud in the background...

hope our kids are as cute as B was!

Blowout Buddy...

I met this lady a decade ago when we were 20!

Hostess with the Mostest! I certainly hit the jackpot 

when it comes to mother-in-laws.

Gal Pals

This guy knows how to make a birthday girl

feel like a million bucks!

Finally, you can't have a birthday post without some pictures recapping the birthday song and blowing out the candles!

 And now, if you've made it this far, let's jump into 30 thoughts and tidbits as I embark on 30. I'll try to mix up serious, random, and fun so it doesn't get too heavy along the way.

1. I recently had a phone conversation with a donor who turns 70 today. I commented that we both had milestone birthdays coming up on the 28th. He chuckled and when I told him I'd be 30, he told me to watch out. Turning 70 seemed like a big one, but the only other milestone birthday that had hit him hard was 30. Today, luckily, doesn't feel hard at all. I have a feeling this next decade might be my best and I'm excited to feel more like an "official" adult. Though, I do think 31 is going to hit me hard.

2. While I don't feel like 30 is old at all, I have cracked myself up a little bit on the vanity side of things. I've thought "I'm nearly 30, I can't wear this" a few times trying on clothes; took my hair back to a blonder shade from my youth during my last appointment; recently gasped upon discovering and then plucked a gray eyebrow hair; and told Bryce I wanted Botox to tackle forehead wrinkles (started using this peel about a month ago instead).

3. Your twenties are such a decade of growth, learning, and change. I started my twenties single and in school and am ending it married with a dog seven years into the workforce. What's funny, is while my early twenties may have been a time of less responsibility, I'm actually ending my twenties with  more of a carefree spirit. I'm still Type A, but I think a lot of my growth this last decade has been in learning to let go, and to choose where to focus my Type A energies.

4. I was born the Monday after Thanksgiving, two weeks early, and my dad, godfather, and other family friends worked tirelessly to finish an addition which included my nursery while my mom was in the hospital with me. Talk about nesting!

5. What I'm looking forward to most in this new decade is starting a family. I'm actually tearing up writing this, because being a mom has been my greatest dream all along. In fact, so much of my life's path up to this point has been chosen with a focus of that in mind. For example, when I started college, I had a serious interest in International Relations and working for the UN (I had traveled to the Hague my senior year of high school for the International Model UN), but realized I didn't want to live or raise a family in a big city like DC, New York, or abroad. While I don't regret a thing about my path, and think I've landed in literally the perfect career and spot, I'm glad to be ending my twenties with more a view of having both a career and motherhood.

6. On the flip side, if you had asked me in my early twenties my life goals, I would have told you I wanted to 3 kids, two boys and a baby girl, and have them all between the ages of 28 and 32. The closer I've gotten to 30, the more I've realized babies can wait a little longer.

7. I've always been bubbly, but the older I get, the more I realize just how important and powerful positivity is. I do my very best to always find the silver lining and also have learned it's okay to unapologetically let go of commitments, relationships, and things that bring you down.

8. Growing up my grandma always got my birthday cake from Westhampton Pastry Shop, a Richmond classic that is right down the street from our home now. Around the time that I was 8 or 9, I opted for ice cream cake instead which she would get from Baskin Robbins. In high school, I made the switch to Dairy Queen cakes (yummmm...cookie dough blizzard cake), and now I usually just get a special birthday dessert wherever I choose to go for my birthday dinner.

9. In addition to personal growth and development in my twenties, my palate also grew. At 20, barely any vegetables crossed my lips and now as I write this post I'm eating broccoli and am not picky at all! I still am not the biggest fan of fruits, though.

10. Bryce's favorite thing about me is that I'm "fiery" and I love that he loves that in me. I can't to be more fiery 30 years from now at 60 and even more fiery another 30 years after that as an old lady when I (hopefully) reach 90.

11. My favorite childhood birthday parties were my 9th, which was a carnival theme with games, face paint and my favorite dinner of chicken fingers, Velveeta mac & cheese, and Coca Cola in glass bottles; and my 12th which was a sleepover and we all went to Fuddurcker's for dinner with milkshakes.

12. I feel most at peace when I'm on the water and have always joked to Bryce that if I ever wrote a novel (ha!) a theme would be the restorative power of water - think about it, a hot shower, a good cry, a dive into the pool, the sound of waves crashing against the shore. They all have restorative power.

13. It's funny how over time our preferences change, but some things always stay the same. Point in case, favorite colors. A change: As a child green was my least favorite color, now it's one of my very favorite. An always stays the same: Pink has and always will be a favorite ("Pink is my signature color." Name that quote, from one of my all time favorite movies, Steel Magnolias - I have the fondest memories of watching that movie again and again curled up in bed with my mom.)

14. Tonight we are headed to Heritage for my birthday dinner. It is one of my favorite Richmond restaurants, and I've celebrated 3 or 4 other birthdays there. If you go, you must order the pimiento cheese croquettes as an app! Also hoping they have the egg nog special I enjoyed on my birthday there last year.

15. Random thought--this is getting hard, and I'm only halfway done!

16. If I could change one thing in my life's path to this point, it would be my choice to go to UVA. Don't get me wrong- I received an amazing education, made some lifelong friends, and have a huge amount of school pride as well as love for Charlottesville. That said, I think I would have thrived more and been happier at a smaller school, though my 18 year old self didn't realize that.

17. Speaking of UVA, I'm most grateful to their Women's Center which offers free, unlimited counseling to students. My second year was a tough one. My grandpa whom I adored died and I broke up with an abusive boyfriend all in the same month. That year I was a mess (though I excelled in school and fitness - the Type A in me tends to go crazy over the things I can control when life seems to be in disarray); and the Women's Center was a refuge. After that year, I continued to go back occasionally whenever I needed a "tune up" and am so glad it exists for students. Whenever I make donations to UVA, I always make them to the Women's Center in honor of Margaret, my counselor.

18. In school, I was always a math and English person, not the typical English-history or math-science. When it comes to English, y'all know I love to read and write and a huge part of my career utilizes both my oral and written communication skills. When it comes to math, I always love looking for patterns around me and geek out over data!

19. I was excited to get the chance to take the StrengthsFinder test for work this year. My #1 strength is achiever (read more about it here), and at first I was disappointed feeling like it was callous and all about just going, going, going. Then I read in the takeaway materials that Achievers are driven by a desire to leave the world a better place than they found it and I thought "YESSS!!!" In fact, when we were in premarital counseling and the minister asked what we saw as the purpose of life, that was my exact answer. My #2 was Strategic, #3 was Individualization, #4 was Learner, and #5 was Responsibility.

20. As I've gotten older, I've realized just how much I'd rather buy less and invest or splurge on items I really love. Sure, I still love a deal and finding affordable items, but the things in my closet that have really stood the test of time have been those splurges (albeit many of them I've stalked and waited to purchase on major sale, haha). Those that follow on Instagram know Bryce treated me to a Goyard bag this year for my birthday, and I told him it could count for all my gifts this entire year, and maybe even a few more birthdays if he wanted. I'd rather have one big thing than lots of little. I also decided to splurge and treat myself to these Ferragamos in London for my 30th and have saved them to wear for the first time today!

21. On the flip, frivolous side, I did snag these on sale on a whim Monday to wear for my birthday and through the holidays!

22. We hosted my family for Thanksgiving this year which felt like a very grown up, almost 30, thing to do. All I could think as I prepared was just how thankful I am to have Bryce by my side. He really and truly is a partner, and how many men do you know that can make homemade yeast rolls, garden like nobody's business; and hunt ducks and do manly things?

23. One steadfast supporter and friend throughout my 20s has been my friend Maddie. We actually first "met" through blogging. She and I are the same age (literally...she turned 30 this month, too) and both started blogs right around the same time. Somehow along the way we became email pen pals and every few months would send each other massive emails updating each other on all aspects of our life, as well as sharing lots of deep, philosophical thoughts about the various phases we were in. When one of her emails would hit my inbox, I'd drop everything to read it and then let it all soak in and respond a few months later. She moved to DC about a year ago, and our pen pal days have stopped because we are now real life friends and have visited each other 3 or 4 times in the last year.

24. Speaking of supportive friends, one of the best lessons I've learned in the last decade was from my best friend, Angela. When I was grappling with the decision of whether or not to leave teaching she said to me "You can keep teaching and know you'll be miserable, or you can try something else and take a chance at being happy." I've thought of that advice so many times over the years since she shared it. Don't ever let the fear of the unknown hold you back from trying something that could be great, wonderful, amazing!

25. Millie is the light of my life. I never knew how much I could love a dog, y'all! While I know kids will be an infinitely deeper love, it breaks my heart to think about Millie losing her prime spot in our life once they come along. We regularly call Millie "baby" so much that she looks up when she hears it, so she's going to be so confused when a real human baby comes along. I even recently told Bryce, when we have a baby, we need to make sure to occasionally leave the baby in the crib so Millie can have Saturday morning snuggles in bed.

26. I'm so glad to be entering 30 in the best shape of my life. I've caught the running bug this fall and can't believe I now run around 5 miles on a "typical" run and have done up to 8 miles on a few long runs. What I've loved about running consistently and at longer distances, is that it's allowed me more balance in my diet. I tend to eat pretty healthy, but running has allowed me to indulge my sweet tooth more frequently while continuing to see the number on the scale go down! I also love that with running, you can really track your progress and set goals surrounding speed, distance, etc...must be that "Achiever" in me wanting to check off the next goal.

27. Speaking of fitness, I'm so glad that I'm also entering my 30th year as a barre instructor! I've loved barre since I started taking it in 2014 and have enjoyed getting to know the instructors I've admired for so long more closely. If you're local, come join me bright and early at BarReVA at 6 am on Tuesdays!

28. I hate that our world has become so polarized and hope to see that change over the next decade. When I think back to my education, the most pivotal moments are the ones that challenged me to think differently, see something from another perspective, and even sometimes be persuaded to change my opinion.

29. In terms of the world today, one of my all time favorite quotes is a Dalai Lama one: "My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness." Yes, I realize there are really really big problems in the world (too many of them), but I do strongly believe in the power of people and that a smile and kindness can go a long way toward achieving a better world.

30. This blog means so much to me and I love the community in you. While my posting frequency has waxed and waned throughout the years, and I do admittedly miss the "old" blogging days, I hope that the blog will live on through my 30s and all to come.

Whew! Did any of you make it to the end?

Many of you asked on Instagram for day to day lifestyle posts like these, so I hope this didn't bore or disappoint.

If you did make it here, can you relate to any of my thoughts?

What have been some of your reflections as you've hit milestone birthdays?

Have a great day!

Confessions

Happy Thursday readers!

I don't know about y'all, but I am ready for the long weekend!

Today I thought I would link up with Annie and Natalie for Thoughts for Thursday. My thoughts today are going to be confessional style. These posts are so fun to read for me, so hopefully you'll enjoy!

I confess I just don't get the Beyonce thing. Be yonce, Queen Bey....I just don't get it! Sure, she's an amazing entertainer, but so are a lot of people. And I really don't get the "You have just as many hours in your day as Beyonce." To be quite honest, I bet I could achieve a lot in my day if I had the staff and means she does. I'm not a Beyonce hater, but I just don't get the obsession. Is there something I'm missing?

I confess I'm having a love-hate relationship with the upcoming summer months. I'm disappointed in myself for not sticking to my New Year's fitness goals...I blame the flu for derailing my progress...and am just not ready to put on a bathing suit. (I have been running 3x a week the last 3 weeks though, woohoo!). I also am feeling overwhelmed as the calendar gets so full. Whenever I'm overbooked it makes me feel like that time is lost. Can y'all relate? We have events the first 3 weekends in June, which makes me feel like July is already here.

Speaking of fitness, I confess I might be catching the running bug. I'm still using my "Running for Weight Loss" app, and don't get me wrong, the running/workout part itself is pretty miserable, BUT, I love the sense of achievement I feel afterwards and find myself actually wanting to go for my runs. Any tips for a rookie runner like me?

I confess I'm having major wanderlust. My Charleston trip was wonderful, but so jam packed. I want a leisurely vacation with Bryce. We're due for a getaway, just the two of us, but scheduling it is proving difficult (ie: my summer confession above).

I confess I am loving Blue Apron! My friend Emily sent us a free shipment last week and we really enjoyed the meals! I love that the ingredients are fresh and responsibly sourced, and that there is no food waste. I can't stand throwing food away! I also confess, I am really loving that it means way less grocery shopping. Have I mentioned how much I loathe grocery shopping?

I confess I am really liking only washing my hair every 2-3 days...thanks for all the dry shampoo recommendations. Batiste (original scent) seems to be doing the trick. I'm wondering though..could the dry shampoo product build-up be just as bad as shampooing every day?

I confess I am really missing being such a bookworm. I'm just too tired to read these days, it seems. Whenever I do get around to reading at night, I can't seem to get past 4 or 5 pages before dozing off. I got 3 books from the library yesterday and am hoping to get some poolside reading in this weekend. I started the thriller Pretty Girls last night, and at least the first few pages seemed really good!

Speaking of being tired, I confess that my exhaustion is totally my own fault. Bryce travels so much for work, and then I often have different social events and obligations after work, so when we have downtime home together at night, we tend to stay up way later than we should. I also battle insomnia occasionally, and the lack of a regular bedtime probably only perpetuates that problem. We need to be better about having a bedtime.

I confess I have still not fully unpacked my spring and summer clothes! I got them from my parents house when I was there for Easter...ya know...TWO MONTHS ago! The bags have just been sitting on our bedroom floor and I've been pulling things out of the bags, albeit sometimes wrinkled, as I want to wear them. I blame the lack of closet space.

I confess I'm a stickler for grammar, and cringe when I see a glaring error that I've made on this blog. I initially titled this post, "Five on Friday: Mark & Graham ADDITION." I was mortified as soon as I realized my mistake and immediately changed it to the proper "Edition." Don't even get me started when I realize I've mistyped a there/their/they're or realize an error much later after many of y'all have read and commented!

My recent confessions, friends!

Can you relate to any of mine?

Do share yours in the comments!

Have a great day!
Follow

Defining My Niche

Happy Tuesday, readers!

I appreciate your patience during my blog hiatus last week. I had hoped to schedule some posts ahead of time during my absence at the Southern C Summit, but those plans fell to the wayside as I juggled preparing for the conference, and also preparing to miss a week of work.

Those of you that follow along on Instagram, saw that the conference was an amazing time. I'm still ruminating over all the information that was presented and the many people I met. I'm also enjoying some time to unwind after what was a whirlwind week. I've gotten as far as unpacking my dirty clothes and enjoying some Goo Goo Clusters from my swag bag. I have yet to look through the many business cards I collected over the week or to download the slew of pictures I took. I'll get there.

I eventually plan to do a series of posts, highlighting the many adventures I had during my trip, but first I thought I would spend some time here writing and reflecting on a theme I heard throughout the Summit's sessions: "Be niche."

A message that was relayed by several different presenters in several different ways, was to find your niche...that one thing you are most passionate about or most an expert on...and focus on it. It left me thinking "Do I have a niche? And if so, what is it?"

Now before I go further, I will share that much of the conference focused on small business owners and career bloggers. I am neither. I started my blog more than 5 years ago purely as a hobby, and intend to keep it that way. I do enjoy making a little bit of money on the side and having the opportunity to partner with brands from time to time; but at the end of the day this blog is my hobby and my creative space. Because of that, I don't think I need to feel pressured to "be  niche." I love that this blog is my blog--a lifestyle blog where I post about anything and everything I want, regardless of whether it converts into likes, pageviews, or comments. On the other hand, though, I'm human, competitive, and a perfectionist and certainly feel motivated on some level by those stats. 

Despite recognizing that I don't have to fit myself into a niche, I still find myself pondering and questioning it. Can "lifestyle" be a niche? When asked what I blogged about during the conference, I continually answered "I'm truly a lifestyle blogger and post about whatever I want. I tend to write about fashion, interiors, cooking, books, and then just my day to day life." "Is that too broad?" I wondered. 

At lunch on Thursday, after a morning of sessions where "niche" came up continuously, my table engaged in a great conversation about blogging as a career versus hobby, defining your audience (whether it be as a blogger or creative small business owner), and the motivations that drive and inspire us all. When Haley of Hermosa Jewelry commented that her customer base and audience includes both teens and grandmothers, it all clicked for me. I shared that defining your audience can't always be driven and honed down to facts and figures such as "women in their late-20s to mid-30s." An audience can also be a feeling or a type. In that moment I felt like I discovered my niche!

I realized that the blog world I entered 5 years ago was not one of affiliate links, professional photography, or branding: It was a community. And YES, wholeheartedly, my niche, can be lifestyle. It can include an array of posts that might not always be connected. Even though I don't post about just one topic, I'd bet that you, my readers, know what to expect when you decide to click over to Alexandra Bee Blog. I hope that you expect to find a fellow woman who is real. I hope that when you stop by, you feel like you're sitting down to chat with a close friend. I hope you see that like you, I'm just trying to figure this whole womanhood thing out...career, domesticity, relationships, adulthood, healthy living, identity, and more.

My favorite blogs are the real ones. The bloggers that bare all from time to time, and make me realize none of us have it all together. The bloggers (and readers) that have been by my side over the last 5 years, through the good times and bad.

So now, if you've made it this far. I want to hear what you think. How would you describe Alexandra Bee Blog to someone? If you're a blogger, in what ways would you define your niche?

I love learning from you.

Have a great day!

Follow

Confessions

Happy Hump Day readers!

Today I'm linking up with Catalyn from Confessions of a Northern Belle. I recently found her blog and am enjoying reading about her life in Georgia as a mama and teacher.

I've always loved confession style posts, where bloggers get real about what's on their minds, the good, bad, and ugly.

No judgment, please!

I confess, I'm on the warpath today. I haven't been sleeping well lately. Something must be bothering my "unconscious" because I've been having all sorts of dreams involving conflicts with friends and family. Bryce has woken me up the past 2 nights, coming upstairs long after I've gone to bed and disrupting my sleep. I may have bit his head off just a tad this morning. Girlfriend needs some sleep.

I first mentioned on Instagram here I've started the Running for Weight Loss app. I've done it for just over 2 weeks now and am feeling really proud of myself. The app provides a guide for interval training, logs your routes, mileage, and calories. I've really been enjoying it. I'm quite Type A and a perfectionist, so I like looking at my logs and seeing how I'm improving my speed. I just started having to do sprints during the workout, and not gonna lie- they're kicking my butt!

On another note, I confess our diet has kinda fallen to the wayside. I will say that we are definitely cooking more which is a huge plus, and when we do cook, we tend to follow the diet. We also have cut out most drinking during the weeks to cut calories. If you read Monday's post, you'll see that this weekend was a complete and utter diet fail.

All that being said, I need to get my booty in gear, because I confess I am really nervous about my bridesmaid's dress for my cousin's wedding not fitting. I know bridesmaid's dresses run really small, but at the shop based on my measurements they recommended a SIZE FOURTEEN! I wear mostly 4s and 6s, y'all. I ended up ordering a 12, because when looking at the measurements the 12 was the better choice according to all measurements except my waist. It should be arriving this month and the wedding is still 2 months away, so at least I have some time to whittle it down some.

I confess, I follow the Beaufort Bonnet Company on Instagram just to get my daily baby fix...and regularly send Bryce screenshots of cute babies.

Speaking of weddings and babies, I confess sometimes I feel like my life just isn't progressing fast enough. I'm definitely not ready for a baby at this moment, but I do have baby fever and as more friends get married and have babies, I'm wishing I was a bit closer to those steps. It's hard not to play the comparison game.

I confess, I think a major spring shopping spree might be coming. I've cut way back on my shopping the last 6 months or so. It's been a good way to save money, but also to get creative with the wardrobe I already have. Now that the weather is warming up and I'm gearing up for all sorts of fun spring and summer events, I'm dying for some fresh new pieces.

I confess, I might be pulling the old high school Spark Notes trick at book club tomorrow night...which makes me feel like a complete failure as book club founder. We've been reading The Secret History and I just can't get into it. For one, it's very weird and it's also really long. It's not that I'm not enjoying it, but I also just haven't been dying to pick it up at nights. I'm going to do my best to read as much as I can tonight and might even go home to read tomorrow at lunchtime. Wish me luck.

What are some of your confessions of late?

Do you relate with anything I shared?

Have a great day!
Follow

LYSSE, aka the best pants...EVER!

Happy Thursday readers!

Much of the pretty snow has melted here and life is mostly back to normal post-Jonas.

I am really excited to be back in a blogging groove. As mentioned before, I've had a list of posts planned for quite a while, but am finally now getting around to write them. Today's post is one of those.

Those that have been following along for a while, know that every year Bryce and I head to the Waterfowl Festival in Easton, Maryland with his family. To get an idea of what the festival entails, you can check out a recap post from my first visit to the festival here. Easton is the most charming small town on the Eastern Shore of Maryland and is filled with unique and fun shops. Bryce's mom and I really enjoy taking a break from all the ducks during the weekend by logging some girl time together shopping. I really hit the jackpot when shopping this year, because I found the best pants...ever!

As we were visiting the different boutiques, I kept noticing the brand Lysse. In fact, at Chesapeake Trading Co, in nearby St. Michael's, there were racks and racks of Lysse pants. After seeing the label pop up so many times, curiosity got the best of me and I decided to try a pair on. Boy...was I glad I did!

These pants, which are also available in plus sizes, are amazing! As you can see, they are a legging style pant, but with a thick enough ponte fabric that they can be dressed up for work or play.

I would compare them to a J. Crew Pixie Pant without the zipper, much softer fabric, and a leaner price tag. Wearing them literally feels like yoga pants, and on top of that, they have a nice high waistband with tummy control. Finally, if I haven't sold them on you yet, they come in endless styles! I bought the pair styled in this post, as well as this flocked velvet pair. And did I mention they're machine wash?

I took the close-up above to show you the detailing on the pants. I love that the print is subtle enough to be a neutral, but still pushes the envelope a bit. I also really appreciate the detail of a visible seam, which makes them more formal than a typical legging. Unfortunately, I can't find this exact pair anywhere online, but this pair has a similar feel.

They run true to size and I am wearing a small.

Next on my list for sure, is a navy pair, but I am also ogling over some of the more daring styles! Snakeskin, anyone?

They also design tops, jackets, dresses and skirts. I will say, I didn't try any tops on while in Easton, because I have a hard time justifying $80+ for a simple tee shirt, BUT, if they are as wonderful as the pants, it might be worth the splurge.

You can shop all styles at Lysse's website here, but after a quick search, I saw Lysse styles were also available at Nordstrom and Zappos....which led me to wonder if I've been living under a rock all this time?

Have you shopped Lysse before?

What are your go-to brands for pants and clothing that are as comfortable as they are stylish?

Have a great day!

Update: I LOVE My New Job!

Happy Monday friends!

I hope you have been doing well. I can't believe that we're already nearing the end of October. This is my favorite month and time of year.

I have really wanted to post at least once a week, but it just hasn't happened. I make no promises for the next few months, BUT, have high hopes of getting back on track in 2016.

I have been meaning for so long to do a big update post on my job.

First and foremost, I must share that I am absolutely loving it. While I felt very excited this summer when I made the leap to resign from teaching, I was also very scared about what the next months would bring. I wasn't sure how long it would take to get hired...or to find the right career fit. I fully expected that this first job would likely be a stepping stone job and a way to gain some experience while searching for my exact niche. I was very lucky, however, to find a job not only quickly, but to find my niche quickly too. I can honestly say that the position I am in is such a perfect fit, and is no stepping stone, but the real deal!

I am working in development for the local chapter of a national charity organization.  We raise funds to better our local community in the areas of education, income, and health. All of the funds we raise get funneled into local organizations through a strategic and intense grant process. Every day as I learn more about the programs we fund and the agencies we partner with, I feel more and more inspired. I come home so excited to tell Bryce about the work we do and feel so proud to get to be part of such an impactful organization. As you can imagine, the work we do in education is most near and dear to my heart, and believe it or not, I feel like I am doing more now to positively impact education than I was when I was in the classroom. While teaching I saw the problems in the public education system day in and day out, and now I am seeing solutions every day. It is a great change in perspective.

My job can be best compared to a sales job. I have a growing portfolio of accounts that I work with to run workplace campaigns in which companies ask their employees to give. A lot of the job entails public speaking to groups of employees about the work we do, but it also involves coordinating volunteer opportunities for their employees, managing distribution of marketing materials, helping to facilitate and attending events the companies put on as a part of their campaigns, linking employees to resources in the community that can be helpful to them, and much, much more. Every day looks a little different and I love that. I am also really enjoying the flexibility. Teaching was so regimented and every day followed a strict schedule. Now my hours vary some day to day according to the meetings and events that are going on. I'm in and out of the office frequently and enjoy how quickly that makes the days go by.

And last, but certainly not least, my coworkers are amazing. We are a tight-knit team and my transition onto the team has felt very seamless. Everyone in the office has been so welcoming and always willing to help or answer questions as I learn about this new field. We have so much fun at work every day and I find myself constantly smiling and laughing. My boss (as well as  her boss) makes sure to always acknowledge the work we are doing and until now, I didn't realize just how under-appreciated teachers are. Being in an environment where you are praised and appreciated really makes a huge difference.

I've received a lot of emails since taking my leap of faith and all I can say (especially to those of you who are struggling in the teaching world), is that it's not worth it to be in a job that doesn't please and fulfill you. I knew I was unhappy, but now being in a career that makes me happy, I realize just how miserable I actually was. All aspects of my life are better now, and it is so nice not dreading work every night or on Sundays. I also come home and have energy. Teaching was so draining that oftentimes, I felt I couldn't even piece together a coherent sentence, and now, I come home energized for whatever the night may hold.

I am so excited to see where this adventure takes me next.

Thanks for all your words of support, as well as those of you that reached out to specifically help me with my search. I most certainly would not have had the courage to take the step I did, were it not for the support from my loved ones and friends.

Have you ever gone through a similar period in your life?

Have a great day!

#BloggersforBCA, Part Two

Happy Hump Day readers!

This week is going by at a sluggish rate.  It feels like it should be at least Thursday by now, if not Friday. Each day the kids are getting a little more wild with the excitement of Halloween coming as well. I'm excited too, though, so I can't really blame them.

I can't believe that the end of October and Halloween is already here. It seems like just yesterday I was scouring the internet for all things pink to share with you for the #BloggersforBCA project. Today I have one  more post and this one is near and dear to my heart, as it is in honor of my mom's best friend and my second mom, "Aunt Sue."  She is a person whose advice I value above others, especially in tough times. She is very wise, while also knowing that you can't take life too seriously....and, best of all, she makes a wicked grilled cheese- the best in the world, hands down! Aunt Sue is nearly a ten year survivor of breast cancer and I am incredibly grateful that she fought and overcame the disease, because I can't imagine life without her.

That being said, those of you who follow along on Instagram know that I've been on a spending freeze this month. The one exception I made to the freeze, however, was purchasing two pieces from Accessory Concierge as part of #BloggersforBCA. The first was the Tough as Nails Necklace for me and the second was the Here Comes a Fighter Bracelet for Aunt Sue.

This past weekend I paid her a special visit to give her the bracelet.

Here you can see a close up of the Tough as Nails Necklace; I also pulled out my prettiest pink nail polish for the occasion, Essie "Miami Nice"

A fighter indeed!

Have you shopped for the cause this month?

Has anyone near and dear to you survived breast cancer?

Have a great day!

#BloggersforBCA

Happy October friends!

I am so excited that my very favorite month of the year is here!

Today I am thrilled to announce a campaign you might see floating around the blog-world this month: Bloggers for BCA.  As many of y'all know, October is Breast Cancer Awareness month. According to breastcancer.org, 1 in 8 U.S. women will develop invasive breast cancer over the course of her lifetime and about 40,000 women in the U.S. are expected to die of breast cancer in 2014. And finally, about 85% of breast cancer incidences occur in women with no family history of the disease. Those statistics prove that each of us is likely to be impacted by breast cancer at some point in our life, either fighting through it personally or knowing someone who is.

That being said, Bloggers for BCA is all about spreading breast cancer awareness throughout the blog community.  Today I am excited to share some ways that you can give back and help support breast cancer research through one of my favorite hobbies:  SHOPPING!

Below you will find many products that work to raise BCA!

Accessory Concierge Tough As Nails Necklace

20% of Purchase Goes to breastcancerfund.org

Also, see their Fight Like A Girl Cuff and Here Comes A Fighter Cuff

Tory Burch Carnation Red York Small Buckle Tote

20% of Purchase goes to Breast Cancer Research Foundation, up to $35,000 total

See all TB SHOP FOR A CURE Styles here. 

Essie "Pinking About You" and "I Pink I Can"

A special curated collection to help raise awareness of the fight against breast cancer.

KitchenAid Raspberry Ice Susan G. Komen Artisan Stand Mixer

The purchase of this mixer helps KitchenAid to raise a minimum of $450,000 for the Susan G. Komen Foundation.

Ralph Lauren Pink Pony Foundation

Enjoy 25% off select styles TODAY and TOMORROW only to help raise for the Pink Pony Foundation. Use code RLGIVE14. I think making a custom oxford (in pink, of course!) would be fitting:

Ralph Lauren Custom-Fit Oxford Shirt

Holst Lee for LOFT Earrings

70% of purchase goes to Breast Cancer Research Foundation

So there you have it, some fun ways to make a difference and raise BCA.

Have you, or someone close to you, suffered from breast cancer?

Have a PINK day!

Girl Power

Is it Friday yet?

This week has really d r a g g e d on!  I am excited for the weekend and to get some sleep...I feel like I have been perpetually tired lately and have had a constant to-do list running through my head.  I am looking forward to turning the alarm off this weekend and getting some rest!

As a disclaimer this will be a wordy, intellectual post. If you're not in the mood for that, I understand: Come back next week or peruse some recent posts you've missed!

Today I wanted to share my musings on a Forbes article I recently read:

7 Ways You're Hurting Your Daughter's Future.  

The article opens with a quick discussion of the glass ceiling and the fact that even now, in the 21st century, women earn less than men.  It then goes on to list 7 factors that affect this gender gap and provides recommendations for parents to help prepare their daughters to reach their dreams, whatever those dreams may be.

Without getting into all the specifics (you can read them here), I'll just quickly list their 7 talking points and then share my thoughts and reflections on the subject...

1.  You teach her to be polite and quiet.

I do believe in teaching kids to be polite and use manners, but I equally believe in teaching kids to have a voice and not back down from their beliefs and dreams.  

love this!

2.  You buy her gender-specific toys.

I personally think this one should be amended to:  You only buy her gender-specific toys...

I was the ultimate girlie-girl, 

BUT...

I also grew up doing boy things...

3.  You tell her she's pretty...to the exclusion of everything else.

Teach her that her worth extends far beyond her appearance.

4.  You indoctrinate her into the princess cult.

Okay...maybe loving princesses isn't so bad, BUT, teach her about all the important work that princesses actually do!

5.  You give Dad all the physical tasks around the house.

Rosie did the work...and looked good doing it!

Love her polka dots and thick eyelashes!

6.  You only let her spend time with other girls.

I love it when my girls choose the blocks center or, on the flipside, my boys choose the kitchen center.

7.  You criticize your own body, and/or other women's bodies.  

Society puts enough pressure on us in terms of body image:  Rather than add to that, instill healthy habits in your daughter so she will have a strong, healthy body...not just a skinny body.

Okay and now for my really deep thoughts...get ready!

This article really spoke to me, because I have always been someone that has felt pulled in different directions in terms of womanhood, feminism, career, family...

I'm competitive and driven.  Throughout college I considered pursuing marketing, PR, law, public policy, international affairs, and more.  I thrive in high pressure situations and could see myself being very happy in the "business world."

On the other hand, though, I'm nurturing and absolutely love kids.  I like to hug them tight and let them know they're loved.  I like to see their eyes light up when they are excited about learning something new.  I like finger painting...and cutting...and gluing.  You can see the contrast, yes?

Similarly, I'm conflicted when it comes to gender roles.

I aspire to be domestic and ladylike.  I want to be admired for having a beautiful home, cooking gourmet meals, and being able to throw a great party. I want to be pretty and wear lots of pink.  I was the little girl that spent most of my free time playing house and dress-up.  I like being taken care of and having a man to help with the heavy lifting.

I also aspire, though, to be admired for my mind and ability to share my thoughts and opinions.  I want to be seen as the girl that can get all dressed up, but also isn't afraid to get down and dirty and be real.  I want to be respected as someone who is confident and sure of herself.  Bryce has told me that his favorite thing about me is the fact that I'm fiery...I know who I am and don't let others push me around. I love that he admires that quality.

Since reading this article and in turn reflecting on myself, my take home message is balance.  I think for my generation feminism is about being able to choose.  Be the woman in the board room wearing pink. Let your man be a knight in shining armor, but make sure that he also knows just how capable you are...and help him when he needs it.  I think that gender roles are very much shaped by society, but I also think there are inherent differences between men and women.  I don't think that's  a bad thing.  I think we should embrace our differences and capitalize on them.

As a future mother, I will take Forbes's 7 suggestions into account...in fact, I'm quite impressed by their ideas.  I want my future daughter to know that she can be whatever she wants...whether that means being a fashion designer or an aeronautical engineer.  She can do everything the boys can do...but she also has the choice whether or not to do the same things that they do.

And finally, as I was writing this post this commercial came on (how apropos!) and I think it is the perfect closing:

So now...if you've made it this far, what are your thoughts?  I've found that I tend to learn the most from listening to other people's opinions.

Have a great day!